Welcome to this world. Mom and dad are happy that you’re there, grandpa and grandma can’t wait to see you and the cats are waiting for you in the cradle. You are fragile, dependent and have a lot to learn. Eating, crawling, walking, talking. Small steps that will soon open a door to a big world that awaits you. Baby steps, literally and figuratively. You deserve to be there.

To my 4-year-old me

Learn more things! You will go to school, you will make friends and everyone will still be the same. You are going to learn to share, to fight, but also learn how to make up. You choose what you want, you will form an opinion.

You are going to make mistakes and get in trouble (throwing hot tea over your legs gives your mother a heart attack and looking backwards while cycling is not the best idea). Enjoy the primary school years. But prepare for mean words of classmates. It’s preparation for high school. You deserve to be there.

To my 10-year-old me

Your parents will split up, but later you will see that it was a good choice. Enjoy living in a flat together with mum and paint your pink room at daddy’s blue. Just because it’s possible! You are going to high school soon. You will have a difficult time with bullies, but you will learn a lot from this. You start to doubt yourself and forget that you have people around you that you can talk to. You are not alone! You deserve to be there.

To my 16-year-old me

You’ve already experienced quite a bit, but there is more to come. Next year you will leave the house and you will face a difficult time. You can’t prepare for this, because who expects to be treated this way by her partner? I would like you to seek help immediately, but unfortunately you are going to hide everything and wait until you’re 19. You get the opportunity to rectify this choice again, but that will take a lot of time. You lose your way, but trust yourself! You deserve to be there.

To my 27-year-old me

Your burnout is on its way. But this will be good for you. Take your rest and learn to know yourself again. Do you remember, that choice you made when you were 19? You are going to rectify this in the coming period. You are going to make important choices that have a lot of influence on your life. You were an insecure woman, but you will become so much stronger in the next 2 years. You deserve to be there.

To my almost 30-year-old me

Almost the big 3-0, the dirty thirty! And see how well you are doing. You are at school where things are going well. You have a job. You are happy. You have dear, trustworthy friends. You are more confident than ever. Therapy has been completed 7 months ago and you’re doing well without professional help.

So briefly summarized, you are shaping your life as you always wanted it to be. You can be proud of that. Don’t lose sight of this. You can make mistakes, not everything needs to be perfect. As long as you do your best and are happy with what you do and who you are.

Cheers to the future! You deserve to be there and you are there too!

The song of this week is Beggers & Poets with Sweat pea. I have changed and that reflected in your clothing and music style. I fell in love with the 40s, 50s and 60s. The last 2 years 50 dresses have been added to my wardrobe and that can only become more. This makes me happy!

Love, Renée

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Expert in PTSD, burnout, personality disorders and eating disorder. Even if I only help one person by sharing my story, I am happy!

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