It may sound weird or arrogant, but when was the last time you have been really proud of yourself? Maybe it is something you have done or said. A step that you took in the right direction. No idea, right? We do not seem to be proud of the small things we accomplish but we only see the big wins. However, those are not more important than the small steps we take.

Awards
You probably wonder what got me to this subject. Last weekend I performed in two regional competitions of dancing. I dance modern and street dance / hip-hop with a small group of great girls (selection group). Three awards will be awarded after every competition for the most beautiful, funniest, energetic dances of the entire show. And we won an award! What am I saying? Two of them! At the first award the surprise was already shedding, the second was simply outstanding!

When the disbelief had dropped a little, it made room for pride. I sat down to analyze the day and realized that I actually had a really nice day! Was it because of the prizes? Of course that was the icing on the cake. But the nerves that usually dominate made place for enjoyment and emotion. I could not wait to get on the dance floor!

Support
At the second show I had an audience! My mother and two friends of mine came to watch. Of course it made me more nervous, but as soon as the music started, I started to enjoy the dance. A few minutes of emotion but after that all that exists is the dance.

My parents and partner support me in everything, they all come to see me whenever it is possible. That feels so terribly good! Of course I have to do it alone, there on the stage, but because of their sweet words and presence it becomes a bit easier.

Little things to be proud of
This is of course such a big event to be proud of. But this also makes it easier to be proud of the little things. Like that one dish that you make for the first time and succeed in one go, or after three devastated attempts and you did not give up. Picking up running after two months. Or not eating that chocolate, even though it looks so good.

Be proud of yourself without arrogance. Also look around you: if you are proud of someone, say it! That boost, the blushing cheeks and the good feeling, share it with someone! After the competition when we were packing our bags, I took a moment to tell the girls that I was proud of us. It was not necessary since it was clear that we did really well, but it was a really nice extra.

The song of this week is ‘Is not my fault’ from Bebe Rexha. This is one of the winning dances. I hope we can dance in Ahoy in June! That would be a nice next step after last weekend’s amazing competitions!

Love, Renée x

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Renée

Expert in PTSD, burnout, personality disorders and eating disorder. Even if I only help one person by sharing my story, I am happy!

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