Just saying ‘no’ can lead to stress and fatigue. Especially, when you already have a lot of tasks to do. Many people feel obligated to say ‘yes’, they’re afraid of the consequences; ‘What would colleagues and friends think of this?’. Also people think that they will be egoistic if they say ‘no’. Always saying ‘yes’ isn’t good for yourself, but what is the best way to say ‘no’?

  1. Rules
    Keep calm and remember the fact that it’s just a request, you’re allowed to say ‘no’ to the request. Also you don’t have to explain or give a reason to it. Only ‘no’ is enough.
  2. Take thinking time
    When someone ask you to do something, you don’t have to answer the question right away. You can say that you’re thinking about it. For example, you can say: ‘I’ll think about it , and I’ll get back to you’. Thinking about the request is useful because you can see: ‘What’s in it for me if I say ‘yes’?’ or ‘What’s in it for me if I say no?’. Because of this you don’t question your decisions.
  3. The way to say ‘no’
    Say kindly ‘no’. You can do this by looking at the person when you’re saying ‘no’. You  can choose to give an explanation. If you’re doing this, first say ‘no’ and then give the explanation. Of course, you don’t have to say ‘no’ with a straight face. Another option is to give an other possibility.
  4. Repating
    If someone is also insisting after you said ‘no’, you can repeat your answer again. You can do this by saying: ‘as I just said, ….’. This indicates that you have already told it and you’re not changing your mind.
  5. You can say ‘no’
    You should say ‘no’ to something if you prefer to do it. Many people don’t mind if you say ‘no’ to them. And not at all if you almost never reject anything. Maybe they’ll be surprised because they’re not used that answer from you. But try to say ‘no’ and look how this is for you, and how people around you react.

NiceDay app: the various tips can help you with saying ‘no’. Of course, it can be still hard  to say ‘no’ to someone. You can discuss this with your Coach, and together you can look for the best way to practice.

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Selin Colakhasanoglu

Coach. Walks together with you to achieve your goals. Loves to play the piano, to travel and different cultures.

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